Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
40s are totally the cure
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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