Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
And then he peed in my hair
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