This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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