Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
honey bunches of taint.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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