This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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