What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Randomize
