i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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