So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
