Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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