Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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