I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
