the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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