the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
my shit smells like andre
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
My ATM looks so different sober.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Terrible idea I love it
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
