Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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