arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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