Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize