He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
