I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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