Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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