Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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