let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
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