You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
