But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
All the doctor said was why
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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