yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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