I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
