I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
