i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
