You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize