the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
This beer is not sobering me up at all
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
