Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
