ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
They are going to name an STD after you.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Randomize
