12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize
