bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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