i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Randomize
