apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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