The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize