The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
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