The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
