You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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