Your face is a jimmy john
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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