it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Randomize
