i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
