hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
