i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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