dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
