every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
