Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
