Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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