420 ftw
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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