We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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