OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
