WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Randomize
